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Cute Quotes Love Biography

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There's a funny thing about love, and it's called everything. Thankfully, some of our favorite comedians can relate, and we found the love quotes to prove it.

1. "You can't put a price tag on love. But if you could, I'd wait for it to go on sale." — Hussein Nishah

3. "I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." — Rita Rudner

4. "I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?" — Jean Illsley Clarke

5. "Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing." — Natasha Leggero

6. "I'm now making a Jewish porno film. 10% sex, 90% guilt." — Henny Youngman

7. "My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me." — Garry Shandling

8. "Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in." — Richard Jeni

9. "If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?" — Lily Tomlin

10. "Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner." — Jerry Seinfeld

11. "My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on." — Joan Rivers

12. "Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family." — Chelsea Handler

13. "Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there." — George Burns

14. "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." — Groucho Marx

15. "Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions." — Woody Allen

16. "If you can stay in love for more than two years, you're on something." — Fran Lebowitz

17. "Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers." — Richard Pryor

18. "There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments." — Chris Rock

19. "My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light." — Rodney Dangerfield

20. "I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself." — Johnny Carson

21. "My brother is gay and my parents don’t care, as long as he marries a doctor." — Elayne Boosler

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.
Oscar Wilde
Life, Heart, Keep
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
Lao Tzu
Strength, Courage, Someone
Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Heart, Sometimes, Eye
Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself - and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is.
Jim Morrison
Freedom, Yourself, True
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.
Aristotle
Single, Soul, Bodies
I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
Great, Hate, Decided
Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.
Bruce Lee
Friendship, Fire, Pretty
Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.'
Erich Fromm
Immature, Says, Mature
Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives.
C. S. Lewis
Happiness, Whatever, Lives
Where there is love there is life.
Mahatma Gandhi
Life
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.
Orson Welles
Friendship, Alone, Die
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle
Knowledge, Heart, Beginning
I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.
Mother Teresa
Hurt, Until, Hurts
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Judy Garland
Heart, Soul, Lips
Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.
Mother Teresa
Smile, Beginning, Meet
A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.
Ingrid Bergman
Nature, Words, Become
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
Albert Einstein
Falling
A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy.
George Jean Nathan
True, Woman, May
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.
A. A. Milne
Hundred, Minus
Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up.
James A. Baldwin
War, End, Battle
Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action.
Mother Teresa
Home, Put, Action
A flower cannot blossom without sunshine, and man cannot live without love.
Max Muller
Sunshine, Cannot, Flower
Can miles truly separate you from friends... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there?
Richard Bach
Someone, Friends, Truly
A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea.
Honore de Balzac
Woman, She, Sea
A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him.

Brendan Fran

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